Blogimony 2014: I think I'll testify...'fear is a liar'

As I sit here reflecting on the events of my life my life,
I am reminded of these two things: 


Let me...testify!
About a month ago, I gave a presentation to a group of nearly
 500 breast cancer survivors about what my agency was doing 
to help them have better lives. 
As I stood on that platform, I was inspired.
I spoke passionately about the issue... 
I was a champion
I came alive on the stage;
It was amazing for me.
I was in my lane. 
I could feel it.

Yesterday, I led a meeting of thought leaders, doctors, and advocates 
in the breast cancer community about how we can best address 
the issue of breast cancer in young women. 
I stood and represented my agency, answered questions, 
and had a lot of thought provoking conversations. 
We were looking for solutions...
it was awesome...
I was in my lane.

Big deal right?
...this is a HUGE deal! 
for since childhood...
I suffered from paralyzing stage fright;
the kind that gave me panic attacks when I thought about speaking in public;
the kind that caused me to sometimes cry...yes...CRY during presentations; 
the kind that made me choke on my words;
the kind that caused me to hyperventilate;
the kind that made my skin go pale...
the kind that made folks in the room nervous that I was gonna faint;
yeah...that kind of stage fright. 
I suffered for years...all the way through graduate school.
it was horrible. 

...the source of it all...fear. 
I struggled from a crippling kind of fear;
fear of being seen...of being exposed...
as though I was guilty of something that I could not name.
It was terrible and I was captive to it.
but things have changed. 
I have learned the truth
...'fear is a liar'. 

fear will tell you lies about who you are
and who others think you are;
fear will choke out your voice and silence your cause if you let it.
but you can't let it. 
fear will cause you to run from an imaginary enemy...
and feel guilty for things that you never did.
fear knows no truth and runs opposite to love.
'fear is a LIAR'

so what changed me?
Love chased out fear;
presented me with truth;
gave me a voice; 
helped me to know that I am loved and powerful;
empowered me to stand;
and encouraged me to speak. 

and so today, I testify.
I testify about the unconditional love of God;
I testify about overcoming my fears of public speaking;
I testify about being a voice for those who cannot yet speak for themselves.

fear is a liar...


Love you much, 

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